Using the Beyoncian definition of diva to be a female version of a hustler, I wanted to draw a line between the average woman and a diva and why when you seen these characteristics about her, make sure to include her on your team. These traits are essential to really building a strong foundation with her and you should almost carry around a checklist like this when you’re out in social functions so you can be prepared. Divas are on the endangered species list right now, taken over by the carnivorous chickenhead population, the ambition-less and goal challenged. We’re going to have some fun with this one so don’t take it too seriously. If you do, perhaps you need a tune up on your life goals.
She’s less interested in what you ‘do’ than in what you’re ‘building’…
The precursory “what do you do” never escapes conversation, and with good right, as it is important to gauge where you are in life presently. Why waste your time with someone who obviously isn’t on the same wavelength as you? After that’s been taken out of the mix, the conversation should progress naturally to future goals, plans and aspirations on its own. If it doesn’t, if she is cognizant that you have more to you than the nice car outside and the number of drinks she can receive from you (which should be none by the way, divas can buy their own drinks) move on to the next one. On the other hand, if she matches goal for goal with you, as equally into where you hope to go as you are in her, you definitely have the makings of a diva.
She’s learned from past mistakes…
Past mistakes could be as simple as a missed opportunity at work , a bad dating choice or as severed as having an unplanned child or young marriage but the operative here is learned. That means that she’s better for it and understands that she’s grown from it. She’s a fighter for it and that in itself is something that is essential to a diva. You might think I’m joking when I say that you will run into more mentally defeated women than you will divas but that is the truth. The same applies to men for women so you know I’m not playing the misogynistic tone here. As easy as it is to be average, the lure is a hard one to ignore.
She has a clearcut view on her life now and in the future…
She doesn’t have to have a 20 year plan or anything as stringent but she should have an idea of what she wants to do in the immediate future. The thing about self planning is it is not what you plan; but that you do. If she understands the process of drafting her ideas into tangible, reachable objects, that means that you have someone that you won’t have to stop and break down each individual step to.
She has an inkling of what Hustle truly is…
To compliment the last point a bit in this one, even if she has no clue what it is exactly that she wants to do with her life, that she knows that she needs to look for it is an accomplishment in itself. In a sense it is like the mentally ill person who understands that they are having delusions or their inner peace is off enough to warrant the attention of someone more versed in it than they. The same applies to Hustle. That innate desire to learn more, better herself and elevate her position is a driving force that will have her in a state of constant change; terrible isn’t good enough, good isn’t the best and the best can always be better.
She’s not adverse to improving herself by any means necessary…
You can tell a lot about a person by what they won’t do. Notwithstanding anything immoral, illegal or unethical, on the ascension to greatness, no stone should be unturned and paper, at any level, is still paper and worth going after. If you’re getting “I don’t want to go back to school” for a quick flip trade or second language, you’re dealing with an individual with a stunted view on growth. If she’s against working a little overtime or picking up a side gig to cover start up costs for her Hustle, you’re dealing with someone not willing to inconvenience themselves for the greater good. A diva, like her male counterpart, is willing to go to 11 to get it done without question or worry.
She doesn’t take her entertainment seriously…
Real Housewives of Atlanta, mani/pedis, what jumpoff of the moment is creeping with every rapper in the industry and the interoffice gossip network. These are examples of things that cloud the average chick’s mind day in and out. Their eyes left the prize a long time ago and instead settled on the Tivo assisted television. A woman who is about hers lets that foolishness sit right where it is supposed to be–the downtime before she goes to sleep AFTER the work is done. I’m not condoning the willing brain rot that garbage like that provides but I understand that everyone needs a vice so I won’t go overboard. A diva is well aware that the programming on the set will not make her wealthier and instead of cuing up another hour long buffoon-a-thon whenever she can, she focuses on her Hustle as her primary entertainment.
She isn’t content…
In my life I’ve had the pleasure of meeting forward thinking women who was willing to go out there and find the answer on her own; in that same breath I’ve been burdened by women who take no social clues whatsoever. These are the types that you encounter frequently who swear up and down that they’re an “independent chick” but have no independent leg to stand on. Same as some guys, having a steady job, a decent car and a good apartment is not independence. At the very most, that is a stable foundation to build on, not put up the overalls, brush the dirt from your hands and go find some lemonade to relax with. It kills me that people want cookies and gold stars for the things that they’re supposed to be doing anyways! You’re supposed to be able to do for yourself and buy yourself the occasional treat. You’re supposed to be able to go to Hawaii for your vacation. That’s not extraordinary, that’s extra ordinary! You are not supposed to be down and out on your ass kicking it Skid Row style. That’s not the place to grow from, it’s the place to go from! like 50 Cent said in “God Gave Me Style” ‘You’re out the ‘hood, that’s good/ Now stay on the grind’. Celebrate the smallest victory yet reach for the biggest accomplishment you can fathom. Being middle of the road and ho-hum will not, I repeat, will not, cut it in 2011. Success or Die.
Brotherhood Of The Game 