THE LOGIC OF THE APPROACH

Whether we are in our teens, twenties, thirties, forties, fifties, and above, knowing how to approach and feeling comfortable about it, is a process we try to master especially when we see someone we like or are getting to know.

So, it is worth examining the LOGIC of an approach. Forget opinions, but focus on logic and reasoning. Through logic the sensibility of how to approach can be derived.

Okay, let’s get logical!

It is true that nervousness stops a lot of people from approaching who they like due to the unknown that creates tension. The tension comes with fear and fear can be paralysing and so the logic here would be to remove tension. To remove it, means getting comfortable in approaching and not caring what the outcome may be.

To get comfortable in approaching, a man has to approach, therefore logic states that he shouldn’t put so much pressure on himself. The best way to ease the tension and create no pressure, is to approach for different reasons other than trying to get to know her. Logic here shows that he needs practice, and like with every activity, he will improve.

One such suggestion for practicing approaching, is for a man to approach ten women he finds appealing just to ask for directions or to ask where they got an item on their clothing. Logic states that by continually doing this, he will eventually feel more relaxed to talk about other things. Anybody can ask for directions, it is a relaxed moment and a moment that has REASON for approaching.

JayStar: Getting Em (R.I.P to Em)

J* bringing the truth in a up front way. The momentum in his delivery does make each topic hit home. The flow in it does help the expression.

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CreativeWritings247: How Women Manipulate Men

A writer getting creative verbally and scripturally.

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Brotherhood Watch: John Morgan and Kalpna Manikin

Keep It Real Till You Feel It

The sayings fake it till you make it or pretend you are the champ and you will be the champ all play it’s part in the mind. The law of the mind says that anything thought about for a long time will manifest whether it is positive or negative. So whether a person pretends or not eventually their mind will believe the recurring thoughts, whether they are being truthful or not.

A blast from the past, Johnny Bravo Style

Whoever grew up watching Johnny Bravo knows that he’s confidence was legendary but he needed to work on his ego. Despite that in a way, as a kid, you wanted to be like Johnny Bravo. He, no matter what had a positive Self Image about himself. There was nothing, absolutely nothing anyone could say or do to make him believe that was wasn’t the most handsome guy in the world, no the universe! (lol). Don’t care what you say, some of his lines should have women laughing not angry.

The Compliment Structure

Many men wonder whether giving compliments hinders their success with women. Being that women like ‘bad boys’, men have decreased and have become hesitant to saying anything nice to women in fear that they will be perceived as a nice guy. Apparently it is better to be perceived as a bad boy than a nice guy due to the fact that women say bad boys are exciting and nice guys are boring.

The Eyes Say It All

The eyes are important when communicating with anyone. With women it is the ultimate sign of attention and respect. Eye contact shows respect to the person talking and everybody wants to be heard. The more a man maintains eye contact, the more a woman is likely to talk due to the ‘go ahead’ to do so because he shows interest. The more interest a man shows with his eyes the faster a woman gets comfortable.

Note that a man has to SHOW interests, action speaks louder than words. Most men are too busy being laid back that they fail to execute any action. A man must act first then be he can be laid back not the other way around. Eye contact makes women seem to forget about appearances and makes her just be herself. In a world where women are taught to be conservative, it is a relief for a woman to just let go and just be. It is also a release from holding back too much restraint from trying to act ladylike and ‘proper’.

A man who maintains eye contact is one who seem to put a woman in a trance. The moment is just him and her and the man becomes someone she can be herself with, afterall he shows it in his eyes.

Gregory B: The 3 Second Rule

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The Approach Structure

Disclaimer: This post is from my perception of how the approaching structure and process is right now. It has been perceived from experience and observation. Ultimately, if you can hold a good conversation the approach is more effective.

Usually before an approach a man psyches himself up and then takes the necessary steps to start the conversation. Nothing wrong with that, a man should lead the conversation being that domestication has taught men to do so therefore making women wait to be approached and led.

Domestication has made the interaction and approach process harder than it should be and at the same time, it has created the opportunity for the process to go from bad to good to better. Anything can be done better if assessed, it is called potential and EVERYBODY has potential to be and do better. To do better there must be experience. Experience can be gotten from mistakes.

Mistakes teaches and is a part of life. Mistakes gives feedbacks which can be used for self improvement. Mistakes can be taken sweetly or bitterly but regardless of the reaction there is always a potential to be and do better. This is a fact!

Reactions and feedbacks, no matter how negative, does not and cannot eliminate this fact. It is negative reactions or the dwelling on the negative that puts and keeps a person down not the mistakes and feedbacks.

Many men who get feedbacks that they do not want from a woman they’ve approached take it largely to heart. They overlook the fact that upon approach, a woman only sees a stranger just like she is a stranger to him. The unwritten purpose of an approach is for two strangers to know each other and no longer be strangers.

In the business and army circles, they call this being an ally or a partner. A woman knows that men are after sex at first and she will test this. Humans get feedbacks from other humans but reject things. So the word rejection will not be used here. We are not things but living organisms that can be persuaded, influenced and manipulated to change our minds.

The mind can be altered. A woman’s no (feedback) can be turned to a yes (feedback). A man’s approach (feedback) must be effective enough to persuade and influence a yes (feedback). This is called negotiating. An approach is a negotiation. Why should a woman stop seeing a man as a stranger? Why should she stop what she is doing and make a conversation? Why? Why? Why?

A man doesn’t deal as much with whys but what. What should he do to answer her why’s? What should he say? What will it take? What? What? What? In a relationship, the why’s and what’s mostly become how’s. How should we balance time? How should we balance our why’s and what’s? Every step of the way requires feedback and strong negotiation skills uses feedbacks to get a required result. Understanding this, a man can then look into persistence.

The domestication is there so our interaction has largely become more of a numbers game. A woman will hear the same things and see men do the same things getting bored not seeing creativity or originality. Yet, the domestication has instilled in women (most of them) that it would be inappropriate for them to approach or to help or ease a man when he does. He should know is what women say.

A woman usually does nothing to help the situation. She simply expects entertainment or excitement from a man, claiming boredom otherwise. The domestication has created women to be mostly judge and jury and men as clowns and Jesters. Because of this there is ‘vagina power’.

Fact is that penis has power to but is on the other side of the spectrum being that man is not woman and woman is not man. The domestication has made it so that both man and woman see only one power, the vagina’s.

Another fact is that sex cannot happen if both penis and vagina do not come together. If a woman witholds, she witholds from herself to. Why withold when you can resolve? What will it take to resolve? How should you go about resolving? These questions will clear up misunderstandings.

Don’t talk to strangers is one of the biggest lessons of youth. To resolve this a stranger then must become a different title; either associate, friend or lover. Anybody in a friendship category can get out of it. It is a title not a behaviour. The mind can be altered, therefore so can the category. The aim is to be friendly through all titles but stay masculine, which is the behaviour. A woman wants a man (masculinity), no matter what the title.

There are two approaches that works but one works the most and better.